Well I kicked him out AGAIN! I know I know, what's the point right? It's not like he is gonna magically just stop drinking and be the man i used to know. It's just so depressing, I feel so alone right now, like God is taking everything away from me to bring me to my knees, or blow my frikken head off one or the other idk? I just feel like screaming, I miss my son, he was always my rock when this stuff happend, my shoulder, but he is away at college and my daughter is too young to hear all this so I am alone! I am not going to air all this to my family , not like they don't already know he is an ass! The problem is......... I love him! God help me I do, so much it hurts, he is my best friend, but i feel like I have lost him?
My other best friend, is fighting cancer for the second time in 5 years, It's not fair, she lost one breast now has it on her liver and in her bones! They think maybe her head? I don't know how i am going to cope without her in my life, I love her so much, I hate seeing her in pain and sick and how her daughter is having to care for her all while chasing a 1 yr. old, it is not fair how life deals us these fucked up hands!
I am just so tired of losing everyone i love. I miss mom so much, I just miss her.
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